Why Men Dump Women: The Top Five Reasons
Women and men get dumped approximately equally
often, but both sexes dump for entirely different reasons.
Men tend to dump women for five common
reasons:
1. Different values/attitudes
This reason is fairly universal across
the sexes and commonly happens in the "getting to know" stage of the
relationship. One day your man wakes up and realizes his girlfriend wants
to have ten kids, instantly you get visions of crying babies, marriage and
weight gain. Many men are very attracted to women who want families, but
for some it is just not their cut of tea (yet). Frankly, they are scared
of women who obviously have serious commitment on their agenda. Whether they
like kids or not, the fact you want them (seemingly) right now is
reason enough for the guy to run in the opposite direction.
2. The girlfriend is too
possessive
Women change when they have a boyfriend;
once a girl goes head over heals for a guy, she ignores her friends, abandons
family and devotes her life to this one guy. Forgive me ladies, of course
this stereotype does not apply to everyone, but everyone in the honeymoon
phase of the relationship is without a doubt more 'drawn' to their new partner
than in any other phase. Some people are truly on the same line with each
other; they have the same "spending-time-needs" and as a result neither of
the two feels either abandoned or tied down. There are cases though where
women (and men!) become so excited about their new love, that it borderlines
obsession. The new boyfriend can soon feel emotionally and physically tied
down when you want to spend every waking moment with him. He still needs
his night out with the guys, without the girlfriend tagging along! Even if
he says it's "OK" for you to come along, there are times where you just need
to take the initiative and give him some space. Equally, you need your space
as well! If you don't have your own "lives" aside from each other, you will
wake up one day with nothing to say to each other.
3. Either he hates your family, you hate
his
Let's face it, when we date someone,
we are also dating the family (in most cases). At some point you have to
deal with each other, even if it is only at Christmas and birthday parties.
Generally people would like their boy/girlfriends to get along with their
closest relatives. If you are openly mean to your boyfriend's parents, or
he cannot stand yours, it is likely he will just decide the relationship
is not working for him. It's too bad when something that seems so trivial
to some can be such a large determining factor, however keep in mind that
the way your boyfriend treats his and/or your parents is a good indicator
of how he may treat you one day, and visa versa! If you are rude to his father
now, you are more likely to be rude to him as well.
4. "Change" of Character
We joke about women who cut their hair
and gain weight after they get married, because they do not need to attract
a new many anymore. Less discussed are our own white lies we tell when we
are trying to attract a date. Everyone has told a little white lie at some
point; we either lie about our tastes ("oh yes, I hate suits on a guy, you
look hot in sweats honey"), or ourselves ("yes, I love to work out every
day!"). If you are telling an athlete you love to work out and give him reason
to believe you have some common ground (i.e. you get to go out running together),
but you are truly a couch potato who would love to like working
out, then at some point he will catch on! If you are serious about pursuing
someone, you may as well be honest because at some point the truth will come
out. Even with little white lies this can make a massive difference. Sure,
you can tell a self proclaimed commitmentphobe you never want to get married,
but if you see yourself changing him and running him down the aisle you are
in for a surprise. You cannot change him, only yourself. Denying yourself
your dreams and what you want from a relationship just to be with someone
is a bad strategy. You are wasting time in which you could be meeting someone
who does have a lot in common with you, instead of being with someone which
who you just pretend to have a lot in common. Sometimes opposites
attract, so why lie?
5. Nagging and other annoying
habits
Sometimes we ladies feel like our significant
others are not listening, or not getting our point. In some cases this is
actually true, but men are notoriously not-so-great listeners. Problem is,
when women keep insisting they are called "naggers". Truth is some of us
are! Next time you feel your naggy side come out, take a deep breath and
tell yourself to lighten up. If he really isn't listening to you, then nagging
will only cause him to tune you out even more. So face the real problem,
and attack the reason you feel you should nag to get his attention.
Effective communication is as necessary as it is hard, but it helps if you
both have similar communication styles or at least openly discuss how you
communicate and why.
For more information about the laws of attracting
a man, please check out Tigress Luv's How
to Become a Man Magnet.